Sunday, August 10, 2008
Someone HAS To Do Something!
The idea that "somebody HAS to do something to solve all my problems" really is not the type of strategic, solution-oriented thinking demanded by contemporary complex challenges. "Action needed" doesn’t quite cut it either.
When we say we want more women on boards of directors at public companies, we do need to look at who can do what, how, why, where and when.
Recently, I faced a new challenge for which I had not yet been trained. I did not yet have the experience, so I contacted “an expert” for advice. The "expert" confirmed for me that the challenge was huge, that I was at a disadvantage, that other more experienced and successful people had addressed the issue thusly:
She spelled out for me the demands I "should" bring forward on behalf of the righteousness of my position. As I heard the itemized shopping list of demands, I wondered if my negotiating position and my experience truly warranted the results that she accurately indicated "others" (older, more successful, and more experienced) had won.
Fortunately, I also spoke with a sage advisor whose judgment had served me well for years. He counseled me, asking me to choose what were my most important goals in resolving this challenge. What were my priorities, not what were others’ priorities? He took a position opposite of mine so I could see for myself what would be the reaction to my position, should I argue as the expert had recommended? How far was I willing to sacrifice? He suggested alternative positions, strategies, wording and phrasing. I tested them out on myself and again with him.
When it came time to get back into the middle of the negotiations, I was anxious but at least clearer in my own mind about what was important for me to achieve and why. It was an interesting learning experience where I gained some things and deferred on others.
Perhaps, someday in the future, I will be in a stronger position to gain more and sacrifice less. But, in order to get to that position, someday in the future, I have to go through today’s challenge and exit this process with more knowledge than when I began this journey. I could not have accomplished that goal if I had simply accepted the "expert’s advice," arguing her righteous and indignant demands. She had nothing at stake. I had everything at stake.
When we say we want more women on boards of directors at public companies, we do need to look at who can do what, how, why, where and when.
Recently, I faced a new challenge for which I had not yet been trained. I did not yet have the experience, so I contacted “an expert” for advice. The "expert" confirmed for me that the challenge was huge, that I was at a disadvantage, that other more experienced and successful people had addressed the issue thusly:
She spelled out for me the demands I "should" bring forward on behalf of the righteousness of my position. As I heard the itemized shopping list of demands, I wondered if my negotiating position and my experience truly warranted the results that she accurately indicated "others" (older, more successful, and more experienced) had won.
Fortunately, I also spoke with a sage advisor whose judgment had served me well for years. He counseled me, asking me to choose what were my most important goals in resolving this challenge. What were my priorities, not what were others’ priorities? He took a position opposite of mine so I could see for myself what would be the reaction to my position, should I argue as the expert had recommended? How far was I willing to sacrifice? He suggested alternative positions, strategies, wording and phrasing. I tested them out on myself and again with him.
When it came time to get back into the middle of the negotiations, I was anxious but at least clearer in my own mind about what was important for me to achieve and why. It was an interesting learning experience where I gained some things and deferred on others.
Perhaps, someday in the future, I will be in a stronger position to gain more and sacrifice less. But, in order to get to that position, someday in the future, I have to go through today’s challenge and exit this process with more knowledge than when I began this journey. I could not have accomplished that goal if I had simply accepted the "expert’s advice," arguing her righteous and indignant demands. She had nothing at stake. I had everything at stake.
# posted by ChampionBoards.com @ 2:23 PM 
